I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
its not stalking. its research.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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