And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
