Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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