the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
if only i could text you this smell
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
