For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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