Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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