u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
