Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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