Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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