I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
