Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
if you like me you must not know who I am
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
