So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You smell like stripper and shame
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
