dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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