Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
no, he came in my armpit
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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