Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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