Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
