I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
