my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This house was built for laser tag.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
