i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize
