Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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