my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize