I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
