Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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