Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours

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  (818): yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours http://tfl.nu/fxuo
  Replies (9) Good night (1462) Bad night (559)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.

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  (704): I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum. http://tfl.nu/041y
  Replies (11) Good night (539) Bad night (2698)
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  (858): View more from California

  i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see

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  (858): i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see http://tfl.nu/4pqk
  Replies (25) Good night (597) Bad night (2499)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.

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  (918): The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting. http://tfl.nu/0qq1
  Replies (40) Good night (4935) Bad night (657)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Clothes are such an inconvenience.

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  (519): Clothes are such an inconvenience. http://tfl.nu/1jcm
  Replies (22) Good night (8378) Bad night (936)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.

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  (720): Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head. http://tfl.nu/67uq
  Replies (5) Good night (2692) Bad night (1860)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.

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  (613): No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal. http://tfl.nu/2rsl
  Replies (6) Good night (1568) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...

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  (937): The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night... http://tfl.nu/fmz0
  Replies (4) Good night (1062) Bad night (426)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that

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  (954): The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that http://tfl.nu/l3dv
  Replies (9) Good night (851) Bad night (472)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote

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  (406): I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote http://tfl.nu/6a7z
  Replies (5) Good night (1551) Bad night (648)
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  (310): View more from California

  Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.

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  (310): Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes. http://tfl.nu/zngo
  Replies (2) Good night (1289) Bad night (438)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.

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  (608): We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you. http://tfl.nu/0tab
  Replies (7) Good night (1127) Bad night (346)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent

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  (937): Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent http://tfl.nu/u4ks
  Replies (2) Good night (754) Bad night (302)
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  (805): View more from California

  I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.

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  (805): I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it. http://tfl.nu/mmaq
  Replies (0) Good night (478) Bad night (207)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.

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  (614): yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner. http://tfl.nu/ta4u
  Replies (1) Good night (572) Bad night (161)

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