they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My balls are so social today.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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