marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
