The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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