and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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