There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
