But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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