Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
