My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
