So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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