That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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