I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
