This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
We got so high we made milksteak
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize