We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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