Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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