So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
