But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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