Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.