God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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