so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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