yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Let's get the cat blown out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize