And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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