so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Please don't give away my fajitas
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
