"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
