I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
