Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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