that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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