hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Alive.
So much puke
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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