They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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